written a while back: a new job offer

want to know something?

I was born to be a mommy (you know I love this calling, right?)
I was not born to be a housewife.

This month after I passed my boards was  h e l l .
This uncertainty of my life map mixed with job prospects, great interviews, playing the waiting game, huge disappointments mixed with "being a housewife" watching all my nursing friends get their dream jobs has been so so depressing.

Can I tell you?
I don't like washing dishes. I don't like doing laundry. I don't like cleaning floors.
The only thing I can appreciate from them is being  able to check them off my to-do list.
I almost couldn't handle it.
Kissing Jeremy goodbye in the morning, faced with "being a housewife"
Sometimes, when he would say, "hey, if you get a minute, could you..."
I would tear up from anger? disappointment? dread? misery?
To all stay-at-home moms, I applaud you. I don't know how you raise beautiful children, keep a clean house, look gorgeous everyday, have time to update your clever blogs, etc. etc. etc.

Dramatic?
It was a new shift of identity that I wasn't ready to face.
I also don't feel confident in my ability to be a mom and a housewife.
I didn't feel like an equal to my husband.
(okay, let me say that these are really personal insecurities).


Anyways, now that you know the turmoil I went through,
I'm pleased to announce I finally have job!
Meet the newest RN of Stonehenge of American Fork.